Short screenplay challenge round 1

Always read the fine print.

When a young woman is down on her luck and is offered a deal that seems too good to be true.  Does the contract for free rent come with hidden conditions of an unreciprocated love?




(MUFFLED SOUND OF RAISED VOICES) through the office window we see a man and a woman.  The auburn haired woman is listening to the man who is pointing to the computer screen and then at her.  She shakes her head, upset.

We see a figure in shadow outside the office, as the woman runs from the office, the shadow enters the room.




TARA a twenty five year old, miserable lonely woman, is outside the estate agents looking at properties.  In her hand an eviction notice.


There isn’t anything here that I can afford.  God knows what I am going to do.

She doesn’t notice a shadow walk behind her.  Then she kicks a bottle which is at her feet.  She looks down noticing that the bottle contains a key and a piece of paper.  She picks it up and shakes out the paper.

TARA (Cont’)

(Reading out loud)

Whoever finds this key, it’s your lucky day.  Take it into Ropers Estate Agents and they will help you out.

(Looks at the key in the bottle and up at the Agents sign)

Nothing ventured nothing gained.  I suppose the worst they can do is laugh at me.

(Pushes open the agent’s door and enters the building)


Tara walks in and looks at the agents, all very professional looking in their grey suits.  Walking over to the first desk she places the bottle with the key inside on the table.


May I help you madam?


This is going to sound stupid, but I found this bottle outside with a key and a note inside.  It said to bring the key in here.

The AGENT picks up the bottle shaking it.  She reads the number on the keyring.


Ah, yes.  This property is available. The terms are a little unusual.  Which is why it wasn’t ever advertised.

We were instructed that someone would be given a key for the property and they were to be allowed to have the flat, rent free for 6 months.  That person would probably be down on their luck.



That would be me then, I just lost my job and have to move out of my flat because my landlord is selling up.

What’s the catch with this place?  Is the rent ridiculous when the 6 months are up?  Or is it a dive?


No, no catch.  The owner just wants to do have someone living in there rather than it be empty.

I think you should go and see the property before you make up your mind.


The Agent and Tara walk to the flat. Tara admires the rooms.

A shadowy figure watches them from the other side of the street.


Okay, I need to read the contract but if it’s legit, then I think I can’t say no.  It is too good an offer to refuse.




There is a knock at the door.  Tara is reclining on the sofa watching television drinking red wine.


Just one moment.

(Mutters under breath)

Who the hell calls at this time of night?

Tara looks through the security eyehole.  She sees a MAN, with brown hair wearing a trench coat, his head turned away from the door.

TARA (Cont)

Who is it?

The figure looks towards the door smiling.  Tara recognises him instantly and frowns.

As she pulls the door wide open, it knocks against the wall.



What do you want?  You have a bloody cheek showing up here after the way you treated me.


(Smile faltering)

I’m sorry about that.

(Looks at the floor, then back at Tara)

Look can I come in.  I don’t want to talk to you on the doorstep and we do need to talk.

Tara steps back, the man walks confidently into the lounge, not the bedroom which is an identical door on the other side of the hallway.

Tara wonders why he knew which way to go.


I think everything was said in the office that day.  I don’t think there is anything left to say really.


I’m not here to talk about work.  There is-was nothing I could do about that.

(Looks at the wine bottle, raises one eyebrow)

Anyway, it looks like things have picked up for you now.


Yes, I got a new job. At least I was given a good reference from the company.

(Raises one eyebrow back)

I’m won’t ask you to sit down, I don’t think you’re going to be here that long.  Say what you need to and then get out.  Leave me alone.

The man walks over to the fire-surround and looked at the array of cards on the mantle.


Congratulations?  What for?  Did you get a promotion at work already?


Not that it’s any business of yours but I’m getting married.  I met a nice fella at my office and we have been dating.  He asked me to marry him and as the lease on this place is finishing soon it seemed like a good idea.  I am moving in with him.

The man turned.


What?  You can’t marry him.


Yes I can, he asked and I like him.


But what about love?


What about it?  It doesn’t pay the rent. If I had other options it would be different.


But all this would have been for nothing.


All of what?  What do you mean?


When you got sacked, it wasn’t because you did anything wrong.  Father guessed how I felt about you and got rid of you.

I wasn’t letting you go, which is why I arranged for this flat and your new job.  You can’t marry someone else.



You what?  This all happened to me because you like me?


No, not like.  I love you, have done since the day you walked into the office five years ago.  Father would never let me date a working class girl.  But now he isn’t in control anymore I can do what I want.

The man dropped to one knee pulling a box from his trouser pocket.

MAN (Cont’)

Please say you’ll marry me?  I love you.


Seriously?  You want me to marry you? Marry into your insane family.  Not a chance. I think you need to leave now.


But I love you, let me look after you. I can do it better than any stranger.  You could have your job back at the office too.



No, I don’t think so.  I will also be moving out in the morning.  Get out.

The man pulls a gun from his other pocket and shakes his head.  He steps forward and raises his arm.


Let it all out

When two girls decide to experience nature the way that nature intended they get more than they bargained for.

“Welcome to Mephitidae Nat~~~~ reserve”

‘They need a new sign, that one is a bit shabby.’

‘I know, but they said to turn right at the faded sign then head on up towards the camp site and just find a suitable place to pitch up.’  Jess smiled a glint in her knowing eyes.  ‘This is going to be fun, don’t you think?   A whole new experience.’

‘Mmm, yeh, maybe.’ Carly sipped the last of her iced coffee then looked out at the tangled branches of the undergrowth, the heat of the day created a visage of shimmer across the dusty track.  ‘I’m still not sure if I want to go the whole hog.  Will there be other people around?’

‘It’s pretty secluded, the organisers said they allocate camping spots for privacy, so that people can have peace and quiet, to get on how ever they want too with getting close to nature.’

‘So we can just take it as slow as we want?’

‘Yes, we can take it slow, we can settle in today and start tomorrow if you want, see how the weather is in the morning.’

The girls surveyed the campsite with satisfaction.  The food net was hoisted into a tree to keep it away from any nocturnal visitors who might decide to feast on their supplies.  They had a large stack of kindling and branches for a campfire, a stone circle surrounded the pit which was stoked ready to be lit later.   Everything was perfect.

‘Phew, I’m shattered!’ Carly sat down heavily on a large boulder, which rocked perilously beneath her.  She wiggled the stone to steady it upright.

‘Don’t fall off that!’

‘I’m fine.’ Then she felt a tickling on her leg, ‘OW! OW! OW!’ Carly jumped off the rock, smacking at her shorts, ‘Something just bit me, OW!’

Jess rushed around the fire-pit, grabbing the front of Carly’s shorts, ‘drop them, let me see, I need to see what bit you.’

Carly dropped her shorts and bent over, Jess saw an angry red welt on the back of her leg. A small red insect was just disappearing into the fold of her shorts.  ‘It’s only an ant.  Nothing poisonous, we can put some cream on that.’

‘It flipping hurts,’ Carly whinged, ‘what a great start to our trip.’

They snuggled into their sleeping bags, Carly lay listening to the tranquil sounds of the wilderness outside the tent.  She could hear Jess’s contented little grunts, because no matter where they were she always fell asleep instantly.  That’s when she heard the snuffling, and cracking twigs.

‘Jess,’ Carly slowly placed her hand on the sleeping form at the side of her. Nothing, she gave Jess a little shake, ‘wake up, there’s something outside, moving.’

‘Wh. a. t?’ Jess mumbled

‘There’s something outside. It can’t be a bear, can it?’

‘No, no bears round here.  Urgh! What’s that smell?  Oh god I hope it’s not a skunk!’

‘Sorry, it’s not a skunk, that’s me. Too many beans at dinner.’ Carly tried to stifle a giggle as she wafted the evil pungent aroma out of her sleeping bag.’

There was another crack outside the tent, closer to the door.  The girls huddled together, looking at the zipper.

Carly, turned her nose up, ‘Oh my god, it must be a skunk.  There’s a different awful smell now.’

Jess giggled this time, ‘No sorry, that’s me, you’re right those beans are evil.  Shall I look outside and see what it is? I might scare it away?’

‘Okay, just don’t be stupid. Stay inside the tent.’ Jess  unwrapped herself from the sleeping bag and slowly raised the zipper, grasping the torch she shone its beam into the darkness.  At first she couldn’t see anything other than the dying embers of the fire.  Then she saw glistening eyes of the animal as it scurried around the campsite.  Its black and white tail flicking in the false neon glow.

She pulled herself back into the tent and pulled down the zipper, ‘Oh My Gosh, it is a skunk.’

‘No sorry that was me again.’

‘No outside, seriously, a skunk running around, must be looking for food, but we should be ok as long as nothing startles it.’

There was an almighty crash and the girls looked at each other, their eyes widened in shock, their mouths became perfect O’s.

‘Oh God, it’s knocked over the dinner pans, I knew we should have moved them.’

Within seconds the campsite was filled with a sulphuric odour that made both of them gag and dive into their sleeping bags coughing.

By morning, the smell had dissipated somewhat. Laying in the tent the sunlight dappled through the trees.

‘It must have been a young skunk, otherwise we would have had to break camp.’

‘Yeh, but our clothes are hung on the tree outside.’

‘Oh shit, you’re right. Looks like we will have to go full hog today until we can wash and dry them.  Good job it’s allowed.’

Carly, unzipped the tent and peered out, the sun was shining making the surrounding bushes glisten in the morning dew, the sulphuric scent had weakened. So she pushed the flap back and stepped out, her body naked apart from her hiking boots.  Jess followed suit, both walked past the toppled pots which had startled last night’s visitor.  Towards their clothes which they had left to dry on branches, the odour had hit the garments badly so they dropped them into a bin liner.

As she collected more firewood, Carly was enjoying the solitude, the sunshine warming her naked body.  They hadn’t seen anyone for days so when she heard the crack of a twig, she turned expecting to see Jess, but to her surprise it was a park ranger who stood there gapping.

‘Why are you naked in the Nature preserve?’

‘But isn’t this a Naturist reserve?’

‘No, this is not a place for naked folk it’s for protecting skunks.’

‘Sorry, I must stop eating beans.’

 Genre: Historical fiction. Location: an Underground Bunker.  Object: a bag of coins.


German Roulette.


True love:  Romantic fool or deluded villain?

A fictional version of the final moments of Adolf Hitler and Eva Braun.


We sit down to dinner, haunch of venison and vegetables.  I hear the moving of staff outside the dining room.  I know they are trying to reassure me that they can find a solution to the problem and that I will rise again but the vigour with which they are doing is dampening my appetite.

I look at her across the white topped table her beauty creates an ethereal glow. Such a clever young thing, who is now my wife; it took me a long time to persuade her, I had to assure her that she would have the protection of the guards and their undying love as do I.  We hold the same ideals which makes us the perfect couple and that after this miniscule debacle is over our perfect children will move forward into the new world.

She looks at me over the rim of her crystal wine glass, perfect blue eyes catching the light, the corners of her eyelids crinkling in that mischievous way indicating that she is trying not to laugh.

‘What is so funny my love?’ I ask her

‘Nothing my darling, I just noticed you staring at me so intently. Such an unhappy frown I needed to make you smile.  You look younger when you smile.’

I curled my lips into what I fancied was a smile, then nodded my head at the rest of the diners.

‘We will take our leave of you all now.  Thank you for your company, good day.’

As one we rose from the table.  I held out my hand to her and she placed hers into it.  She smiled benignly as the other men around the table stood and bowed, showing her the required mark of respect my wife deserved.  We walked down wood panelled corridors and stairways leading to the lower quarters of the Führerbunker just in case it was stormed overnight.  A rumor was circulating that there was a bounty on my head, alive or dead it didn’t matter, so we were taking no chances.  We were going to be in the deepest room tonight, just me and the love of my life.

‘Would you like a glass of wine my love?’ I held up the bottle.

‘Yes my darling that would be nice.  But then come over here and we can discuss what we are going to do.’  She patted the sofa.

I carried the two wine glasses over to the sofa and sat down beside her, our thighs touched.  I felt her body tremble through my course trousers.

‘Don’t be nervous my love.  We are safe here.’

‘I know, but I am just worried for the future.  What we need to do to safe hold your shining star to continue leading the superior nation.  Your icon has to continue whatever happens.’

‘It is all in place my darling. The books are written and stored safely.  There are still those who will believe in me when I am not around, I will continue my calling.  You have now completed me.  My life is now whole with you as my wife I am just one step away from perfection.’

‘But the wa….’

I put my fingers on her lips to stop her finishing her sentence, ‘now is not the time for negativity my love.  We will continue with our plans and our purpose will endure not matter what the British pigs might say or do.  The Arian race is superior, we will prevail.’

She, walks over to the portrait which hangs on the wall. She traces the image of the cross with her finger, then turns to look into my liquid filled eyes.

‘Have you ever slept with another woman?’ she asked.

‘How can you ask me that?  You are the only woman I have ever loved and I proved that by marrying you.’

‘But without your issue, how do you know that the Arian race will continue and that everything will perpetuate?’

‘Trust me my love, with the educational plans I put into place and the men I have trusted to steer the youth of the motherland, our legacy will live on.  The Jews will have long memories and fears of the concentration camps for many, many years to come.  The world do not see yet that I have cleansed the kingdom of impurities and they will be frightened of it happening again.  They will try to control it but it will smolder under the surface waiting for the right time to rise up.’

‘But other than that belief, how do you know that these men will stay true.  Those who want to stop you have drawn up a list who are not even going to be tried for their actions, they say they are just going to execute them.’

‘Ah, that is where the bags of gold coins that we took from the Jewish banks will come in useful.  Man will stay loyal if he is paid enough and thirteen pieces of gold in a bag is enough to buy loyalty.’

‘So, you have it all thought out my love.  I knew you had brains.  One of the reasons I married you. I just wish it would have happened sooner we could have had longer.’

‘I know, but you are the only one I trust to do this properly.  You won’t let them take me alive to torture me first, as I wouldn’t let them take you either.’

I pull Eva in close to me, we hold each other tightly.  I can feel her heart beating through her dress, the salty tears threatening to fall from her eyes stays resolutely in place.  I hand her the gun and the pill.

‘Are you ready?’ she asks me as she steps back.

‘Yes.’ I reply

She holds the gun under my chin, puts the tablet into her mouth and then puts her hand onto my shoulder.

I nod and she squeezes the trigger a little bit tighter.

‘Remember I love you.  Heil Hitler.’


Sunday a day of refection

Quiet and calm reflection on a Sunday…..

Not for me, lots to think about today.

Yesterday I went to a speech by James North at Carlisle Library, he gave me lots to think about for my first novel.  He was a very interesting man and I look forward to stalking him,    ooops I mean following him on twitter and wait anxiously for his next book.   I like interesting people who are not full of themselves, or when they are sharing an anecdote it is interesting and lively.

Today is filled with writing my final assessment piece for GCSE english,  Yes still on with that, sometimes these things are so hard to start, but then when you do its hard to stop them.

Oh and the Skype interview,  BIG fail, the other person didn’t turn up so there you go.  No job there for me  I don’t have time to sit around waiting for people to not turn up and not interview me.  Moving on with the rest of my life.  Lots of things to keep me busy.

OH and totally none writing related only 7 days until the London Marathon   very excited, but might have to turn it into hours to make it seem further away   lol

Friday….. The weekend starts here

Or does it?

Well technically no, its still the end of the working week but hey the relaxing can take precedence over working.

Today I will be mostly focusing on writing my final controlled assessment piece for GCSE English  (yes you read that right, GCSE English, why not got to keep the grey matter turning over, next year I am thinking of doing GCSE Math and Spanish)

This controlled assessment piece is to write about a film and how it has influenced our lives in any way shape or form.  I have picked Pretty Woman, ALL TIME CLASSIC, you just have to love Julia Roberts and its any excuse to watch the movie again and say all the one liners just a split second before she does.   (Yes I am that boringly obsessed with this movie lol).  But seriously it has everything in it that I can use to write a good essay so why not.

I have a skype interview later on today, that will be interesting.  Its hard enough doing a normal face to face interview never mind a skype one.   I will find out if I can update you all on the outcome of that one.

I am also going to do some planning for the subsequent chapter of my novel.  I need to finish chapter two because that is the final part of my  EMA for the Advanced Creative Writing course I am doing.  Still waiting on marks coming back on the first section that I sent off to the tutor.  I had a dream that she didn’t like it and only gave me 30 marks out of 80 for it.   But it doesn’t really matter if she doesn’t like it,  I just know she won’t be buying the book when it gets published.

Well the sun is shining and I suppose I better go and do something productive, like make a cup of coffee, seeing as I have just been for a nice 6 mile bike ride as part of my London Marathon Training (9 days to go O.M.G!!!)  then crack on with writing and stuff like that eh.

Hello world!

The title says it all really, this is my first blog post as a writer.  I have nearly finished my degree with the Open University and I have just got my final piece of work to submit on my final course.

I am then officially going to be an out there graduate, a Bsc Open with Honours under my belt and three creative writing courses under my belt.  Not much writing experience I hear you say.  But I have always had a passion for writing and I love reading.  The creative writing courses themselves have opened up my eyes to different genres of reading now, so I am expanding my reading styles which I hope in turn will expand my writing style and experimental pieces.

I plan on continuing my novel that is the final piece of work that I am submitting (we get to submit the opening chapters) when I have finished.  I also have an abundance of other ideas for novels for younger readers as well as different genre stories too.   I am going to let the creative muse take me and see what happens.

Once I have a complete novel to submit to an agent I will obviously send the little baby off into the ether and see if it flies or gets rejected.

In the mean time I will just have to try and think of interesting things to blog about.